I am so excited to share something really special with you guys! Nourish is going to have a Wedding Countdown Series with a special prenuptial article every Monday! Our marketing coordinator, Tenessa, recently got engaged and is very generously not only writing about her pre-wedding planning and experiences, but also her tips and tricks to be healthy inside and out leading up to the big day.
With that note, I'm passing today off to Tenessa!
What I Learned About Myself after Getting Engaged
I got engaged about 3 weeks ago! It was absolutely perfect. I am still on cloud nine and catch myself staring down at my ring every day.
While I am so excited to spend the rest of my life with the man of my dreams, another emotion came over when he popped the big question. Am I ready? Now this was an unexpected feeling for me to experience because I know I am ready to marry him. I knew it after only dating a few weeks, we are a perfect match, I can just feel it in my bones. But what I was feeling had nothing to do with him or us, it was about me.
I started thinking to myself, “I need to be the best me when the big day comes.” “I need to step up my work-outs, my skin care regimen, my organization, my financial planning!” I started going through all of the different things that I have been working on for myself and thought in my head, “I need to accomplish ALL of this before the wedding day. I need to be perfect when entering in this partnership for life.”
So instead of basking in the glow of being newly engaged, I started stressing out. Frantically scribbling down routines and check lists of things I NEEDED to accomplish. After realizing I was a bit stressed, my fiancé (still weird to say that) said that I didn’t need to have it all together before we got hitched. He has loved me now and will still love me even if I am not my “perfect” version of myself. He really put it into perspective for me. I need to enjoy this time with loved ones and celebrate! Does anyone else feel like this? Like you need to be the best you RIGHT NOW and if you are not, you are a failure. This is something I have struggled with my entire life. I want to be the best version of me that I can possibly be but I get so upset with myself if I don’t wake up in the morning to complete my work out, if I have eat too many pieces of chocolate, or that sometimes I would rather sit on the couch in my sweats than go out.
But as my time of singledom is slowly coming to a close, I realize that I don’t want to be thinking about things I “should” be, it is time to learn to love myself as much as my fiancé loves me.
Instead of using my energy to stress and over-complicate things, I decided to take a deep breath and relax. If you are anything like me, you are a perfectionist and sometimes that hinders and paralyzes us. I think, “If I can’t do it fully, I won’t do it at all.” This is something that I am trying to pull away from thinking.
In order to do this, I put my skills and strengths to good use and made a to-do list. This helps me stay organized and focused but also allows me to de-stress and not put so much pressure on myself.
So without further ado, here is my list of things to work on before the big day. I am looking at this list of not only things I can work on before my wedding, but also things that I can do in order to learn to love myself to the fullest. I know when I feel my best inside and out, I am my best self with others, with my work, and inside my own head. Stay tuned as I go through each of these in depth as the wedding process begins!
- Start keeping a journal. Write down all thoughts and feelings leading up to the big day.
- Start a realistic fitness journey (incorporating meditation). Kick up my fitness routine but stay realistic and healthy. Also, start using 5-10 minutes per day to meditate and de-stress.
- Buy a water bottle and stay hydrated. Hydration is KEY when losing weight and being healthy. I need to find a good water bottle in order to hit my goal of at least 8 glasses of water a day.
- Become organized with finances. As I will be putting my finances together with my fiancé once we are married, I want to make sure that everything is set and ready to go for that. Also, I want to make sure I keep close track of a wedding budget.
- Start skin care regimen. I want to have beautiful, glowing skin on my wedding day. I have always struggled with my skin, especially in my 20s which is worse than having acne as a teenager in my opinion. So finding a skin care regimen that works for me is very important to me.
- Meal planning to save money and stay healthy. This ties in with my other goals of getting healthy and saving money. I need to find a routine that works for me each week which will allow me to meal prep and stay on point with meals.
- A personal book club. I want to read at least a book a month this year leading up to my wedding. The topics ranging from a self-improvement, relationships, beach reads, and classics.
- Find a wedding venue. Start the journey in looking for a venue!
- Ask bridesmaids to be in wedding. Who to ask and cute, personal ways to ask!
- Have open conversations with my fiancé about wedding and all things life. Continue to have serious conversations about our life goals, important things to us, wedding process. We are already very honest and have had many of these conversations before our engagement but I also want to be prepared for married life and don’t want anything not out in the open.
If you are engaged or married, leave your fun tips and tricks in the comments below! Also, if you have any blog posts you want me to touch on throughout my wedding planning process, leave ideas in comments and I will make sure to touch on them.